Geez, remind me to steer far clear from Elena before she’s had her morning coffee.  I think Jeremy will think twice about it from now on!

Now that I’ve had more than a week to process “We All Go A Little Made Sometimes,” aka Connor still won’t go away, I have to say a re-watch was in order since this episode didn’t grab me the first time around.  Maybe because the full blown electric shock of seeing Jeremy with a big kitchen knife going through his neck left me somewhat tattered.  Good thing Elena is a vampire now, huh?  I kept thinking, how many more times does Jeremy get to die wearing that ring before he goes all loopy like Alaric?  Speaking of Alaric, weren’t we supposed to see more of him by now?  That drink isn’t drinking itself!   

Right, the re-watch.  It came out a little better, but my head-scratchers are still there.  More on those coming.  Elena’s hallucinations were the highlight of the episode, and whoa the things in that girl’s head.  I hope if anything the surfacing of that baggage ends up being therapeutic.  It was surely entertaining.  I do love how the imaginary Katherine got to mess with Elena’s mind about her little Stefan or Damon conflict.  I’m sorry, but after hearing Katherine, aka Elena’s mind, say, “When Stefan knew the real me he hated me.  Now he’s going to hate you too.  We’ll at least you still have Damon,” I was screaming for both Salvatore brothers to run!   They both don’t need this crud, they have their own.   

Elena’s inner conflict about her Salvatore dilemma is nothing though compared to all that history on the Wickery bridge.  Talk about survivor’s guilt.  Hallucinating your sweet, compassionate, dead mother tell you that you should be dead, and it’s time to finally fix that is just messed up.  I do like all that guilt coming full circle, but the whole setup, predicted accurately by Klaus, ultimately existed to swing Stelena into Delena territory.  After all, the love triangle is the whole fabric of this series.  But still, I can’t help but thinking all this drama happened because Stefan was again being a bonehead.   

I don’t know, is Stefan being a bonehead?  Probably not as much as a lovesick fool that thought he could get through to Elena in her horrible state.  Plus, in fairness, some things just didn’t go his way.  Elena stabs him and escapes (thinking he’s Connor) and now Stefan has no choice but to call in Damon.  He’s confident Damon will get through to her, probably because she called Damon after her homicide of her little brother.  The truth is though, Damon benefitted in this case from good timing more than his power of persuasion, but at least Elena knew she was talking to Damon in her state.  Jeremy managed to break the curse just so Damon could save her in the nick of time.  Stefan’s case only gets worse when Damon, after playing hero, tells Elena about the cure.  The one thing Stefan should have done the second he found out about it.  No matter what his intentions, which are all for Elena’s benefit, all he’s done is succeed in driving the love of his life into his brother’s arms.  Damn these twisted love triangles!

I’m really glad this Stefan and Elena breakup wasn’t mired by tears and drama.  It doesn’t make any sense other than they got to keep that love triangle a going, but their reconciliation didn’t make sense either so you aren’t getting any complaints from me.  Elena is too far gone from the starcrossed lover territory.  She’s not the same fragile flower, although a case could be made she’s a different fragile flower.  As much of a Delena shipper I am though, I’m not ready to swim in that pool.  Elena is going through some big changes and needs to find herself.  I’m all for her getting through this by support of friends and the one family member she has left.  Who she stabbed in the neck with a giant knife.  Yikes!  Maybe she needs to live in a secluded cabin in the woods for a while.

I’ll tell you who I’d like to see find himself and that’s Damon.  I love how he and Stefan were on the same page this week, putting their brotherly bond ahead of the Elena drama.  I want to see more bros before hoes.  I also want to see Alaric’s ghost joining poor Damon for that drink.  The guy needs a friend!  He’s not all bad.  Come on Bonnie, you can’t make that happen?

Now, time for the head-scratchers.  For one, we’re still stuck in the land of the meandering plot, aka the hybrids.  How are we supposed to care about these generic characters when as soon as a new one pops up each week, he or she will be headless by episode’s end?  At this point, I don’t even care about Tyler as a hybrid.  I’m longing for the days when he was just a simple werewolf.  Come on Bonnie, you can’t make that happen?  It’s a plot thread so frayed and worn it’s dissipated into nothing, and the same goes for that stupid sire bond.  Either kill them all now, or let them scatter like good useless monsters so the wasteful scenery chewing can come to its rightful end.  That includes Hayley.  Give her a plot already or let Jeremy take her next.  Oh, wait, I see now.  That’s probably Klaus’ plan.  Unveil the map by killing off all the hybrids.  Then I’m good with that.  Can it all happen in one episode?

I’m also trying to understand why Elena’s life gets such priority over everyone else’s.  Right, because she’s the lead character and the show would suck otherwise.  I would have been happier if she found out about the plan to kill Chris  and refused to let another being die on her behalf.  You know, a moral ground thing that defines characters.  Chris the headless hybrid was a cheap way out.  Sure that would have probably dragged her suffering out one more episode, but what’s that to Klaus’ 52 years?  Jeremy could have found a bad guy generic vampire in that time who deserved it.   There’s always one showing up in town every week. 

While I’m on a roll, oh Caroline, where’s your kick ass, wonderful plot?  I can’t think of a more contrived situation than agreeing to go on a date with Klaus because the plan to free Elena went terribly wrong.  So Tyler gets mad?  Heck, I’m mad.  Get in line buddy.  I can think of about 800 different ways for Klaus and Caroline to come together.  Maybe it’s because I’m love triangled out right now.

So what have we learned from all this mess?  Nice guy hybrids end up dead, dishonesty, no matter what the intention will blow up every time, never kill a vampire hunter with tattoos if you’re a vampire if you want to see things that are real, if you want to go on a date with Klaus just piss him off, and stay away from Elena if you’re human and don’t have a ring protecting you from death.  Far, far away.  Hear that Matt?  Hey, where was Matt this week?  No wonder I was grumpy.  Also Suresh, I mean Shane, was there and we were given a clue that he and April’s Dad are connected.  Film at 11.  Speaking of missing plots, shouldn’t April have one by now? 

New episode this week and the plot bunny will continue to bounce along.  Plus Gaby Douglas appears.  Nothing like stunt casting in the thick of a dubious plot.   

Screencaps courtesy of Home of the Nutty.

 

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